New Year, New Resolutions

I am not a resolution kind of guy. I do not usually restrain myself from doing things that I know are not exactly correct. Like attending a rock concert without inebriating or stoning myself. Or turning up for a viva voce examination wearing a capri and a T-shirt that says : "If I cannot answer a question, it's a stupid question" Or going to somebody's wedding reception and wishing the bride and the groom a good married and sexual life. While this is not exactly appropriate, I do not find it embarassing. You people are probably thinking that I am a dork. Who goes around wishing people a good married life? Who are you kidding? It's totally tactless on my part to rub salt into the groom's wounds. It's bad enough that he has to get married in the first place and here is someone who is actually wishing him a "good" married life. But then, that is the sort of person I am. Which is : a no resolution kind of guy.

However, this year is different. Somehow, with it's onset, I found myself thinking. And since this is a rare event in itself, I thought some more and decided to stop thinking. I was getting dizzy. It happens when your mind is not used to receiving more than three thoughts an hour and here you are throwing around ten thoughts at it in a minute. As a result of this, my mind went into total overdrive, ordering my mouth to consume insanely large amounts of chocolate and ice-cream. So, I ended up destroying my resolution before it even started. The thought that had initiated my mind-bending, mind-boggling, thought reeling, imaginary brain spin was that I had resolved to eat less sweets this year.

All you foodies out there probably know about this. Thinking about dieting and exercising can be so depresssing, who would want to actually go out there and do it? The thought itself is scary, enough to send you into a chocolate chomping tizzy. It does that to me every so often. However, seeing that my belly has the diameter of an oversized Volvo truck tire, I sincerely need to do something about my current state of affairs. So I have decided to lay off the good stuff for a while. I am sure that I will be able to resist the urge to umm.... that tastes so nice. Cadbury sure knows how to make chocola... I mean Dabur sure knows how to make Chyawanprash. Kindly overlook the typo, will you?