A lesson in Plain Jacking

I read in the newspaper a few days ago about a boy calling up the airport to delay a flight because his girlfriend was on it and he didn't want her to leave. Now in case his wife was on board, he'd personally go to the airport and hold off any terrorists planting a bomb on the plane.

Terrorist At The Airport (TATA) : If anyone tries any smart moves, I will blow the whole place to smithereens!

A Man Busy Accosting New Immigrants (AMBANI) : Hey, you can't do that sort of a thing in here.

TATA : (Taken aback) Why not?

AMBANI : Because this is the Mumbai International Airport. The staff is on strike, the planes are late, and the loos stink. And on top of that, if you make a ruckus, the junta will plain kill you. Get that? Plain kill you in an airport! Ha ha ha.

TATA : Ha ha ha. (He shoots AMBANI) What the heck? (turns around to find a man with three suitcases and two handbags, who's rushing past him) Just what the heck do you think you are doing?

Harried Man : I am carrying my wife's luggage to the plane.
TATA : She is leaving, is she?
HM : Oh Yeah! You bet!
TATA : Okay fellas, bombing called off till further notice.

Such is the deep understanding that males share you know. We males are constantly blamed for being insensitive jerks, people who ask "What's for dinner?" at a condolence meeting, who have the sensitivity and etiquette that a mature rhino has. I hope this particular display of sensitivity, by a terrorist nonetheless, should kill all those doubts. In case the doubts are not killed, the terrorist will kill the people having those doubts.

So, coming back to the boy who made the call. There was no need to cause such furore over such a trivial thing as a girlfriend going away. He should have delayed the flight if she was coming back. By making such a hoax call, he caused unnecessary hassles to people. Some people suffering from hypertension had heart attacks, some women went into labour even though they weren't pregnant (Hey! Stress can do that to you!) and many people jumped off the plane and landed with a "Thump!" on the tarmac. Now, if he had made that call when the plane was in mid-air, the passengers would have been saved the trouble of landing on the tarmac. Such an inconsiderate chap the boy is.

I have an idea for the terrorists who keep hijacking planes and airports and keep asking for things in return. In the process, they end up killing a lot of people and destroying many nice things such as airport chairs, custom free shops, etc. Such a waste. They should not do this to custom free shops. Instead of using ammunition or firepower, they should threaten to disable the plumbing system of the airport. That will cause absolute mayhem, because given the kind of food that is served on airlines, God only knows what reaches the toilets! Yuck! My advice to potential "jackers" (pun unintended) is that "Drop the gun! Get the spanner"

P.S. Just make sure that you are considerate enough to let the man's wife's plane leave. And don't kill AMBANI, just conk him on the head with the spanner.